Day 10 (6-23-2011)

Who needs to rent a house when your friend's parents own one and will let us live there free??? FREE!!!

Where is it located??

Oh just across the street from my parents (Which by the way, is the best thing I could have asked for!)

Who can say "MY GOD IS AWESOME!"

I have been praying that he would send me some sign that he was working in my life....DONE

I have prayed for a roommate... DONE

I have prayed to move out of my house.... DONE .... FREE....

I have prayed for my husband this summer or something better..... REALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO WHAT HE DOES!!!

I have prayed that this summer will be the best summer I have ever had.... Looking like God is coming through for me :)

Day 9 (6-22-2011)

Met up with my best friend that I haven't spoken to in almost a year. Such a blessing. And now I have a new roommate!!! Going to look for rent houses!

Thank you, Jesus!!!!

Praying for peace, hope, joy, and happiness!! :)

Day 8 (6-21-2011)

We have had some CRAZY storms! I have had such a better day today.

I am still praying that God will send me my husband this summer or something better.

Also, I love my family, but I just feel like I need a place of my own, but I don't want to live by myself. :( Giving it to God.

Day 7 (6-20-2011)

I had a terribly hard day today. I really feel like Satan was trying to get me down. It was the first time since my break up that I truly cried. The entire day I felt like there were tears welling up and ready to fall at any minute. I was a ticking time bomb. My mom is the best, though, she really says what I need to hear. I have decided that I am going to start asking God to send me my husband this summer or something better :) I am praying that God will be with whoever he has prepared for me, that he will lead and guide him straight to my doorstep.

Thank you, Jesus!

Day 6 (6-19-2011)

I have to start being honest with myself. I created this blog for me. To watch how God proves his ability in my life. Sometimes I think I forget what all God has done for me, and I thought this would help me see how my life is constantly changing and being molded into something glorifying to God. However...after I started this blog I began to have insecurities about people maybe seeing it. I have really monitored what I have said, and I think that it totally voids the purpose of this blog when I do so. Therefore, I have decided to make my blog private and really pour out my true feelings.

I have been doing pretty good since my recent break-up. I have been sad at times thinking about fun things we had done together, but it never turned into tears because I could also remember all the nights I cried as well. Anytime I thought of "good times" I had 15 heart-breaking memories to go along with them. I knew it wasn't God's plan, and had peace about it. So I guess I could say I was really doing well. UNTIL yesterday. I don't know what was up. I couldn't sleep. I cried and cried and cried. I felt absolutely hopeless.

I still live at home!
I just broke up with my boyfriend who I thought I was going to marry!!
Now I have nobody!
I'll be living in this tiny, boring, sad little town forever!
I want a husband!!
I want my own family!

Is that a terrible thing to ask for? Is that being selfish?? That I want to share my life? That I DON'T want it to be all about me. I was struggling. And truth be told I still have those thoughts. Where is my husband?? But I woke up this morning, and I knew God was very close to me. He has been for a long time, I am just now able to recognize it. I know God will send him. I know it will be better than anything I could have ever created for myself, and I will rest easy knowing that. And until that day comes and even after, I am going to fix my eyes on God and trust him with my whole heart.

Jeremiah 29:11
For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord,
plans to prosper you and not to harm you,
plans to give you hope and a future.

Day 5 (6-18-2011)

Matthew 21:22
"If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer."




Mark 11:24
"Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours."




John 11:22
"Even now God will give you whatever you ask."




John 14:13
"I will do whatever you ask in my name, so that the Son may bring glory to the Father."




John 15:16
"You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you to go and bear fruit-fruit that will alst. Then the Father will give you whateve ryou ask in my name."




John 16:23
"In that day you will no longer ask me anything. I tell you the truth, my Father will give you whatever you ask in my name."




The only thing these verses are missing is the word, "now." I have faith that God will give me the desires of my heart. I believe that his plan will fulfill every want that I have ever asked for. My problem is I want it now. I think God is teaching me patience right now. I also feel like He wants me to find contentment in the "now" and trust that the things I have asked for will come, IN HIS PERFECT TIME. And why would I want anything else? So for now, I will praise him for what I have now, and look forward to what he has in store.

Today I want to praise God for the sunshine :) Yesterday a friend and I speant the day at the lake. We had a wonderful time, and now I have the worst sunburn in the world, and I can barely walk. HOWEVER..... it reminds me how blessed I am to have the opportunity to spend the day with friends, relaxing, and enjoying my summer.

I am going to give up using salt. I know that sounds strange, but I love salt, and I use way too much, so today I decided I am not going to use salt. :)

Day 4 (6-17-2011)

Since I have made a point to read my bible and pray everyday I have had different songs stuck in my head. Not just any songs, though... church songs. Hymns, vacation bible school songs, worship songs. Without even realizing it, I will be singing songs to God throughout my day, and it is awesome. Many times the songs are comforting and once I realize I am doing it, it almost seems like it was put in my heart for a reason. For the past few days I have had the same song in my head. Over and over... you may recognize it.

Oh be careful little ears what you hear

Oh be careful little ears what you hear

For the Father up avove

is looking down with love

Oh be careful little ears what you hear

Oh be careful little eyes what you see

Oh be careful little eyes what you see

For the Father up above

is lookind down with live

Oh be careful little eyes what you see

I have been singing this song for at least 4 days now. I thought it was kind of random and funny until yesterday. I was googling the top 100 christian songs and before I clicked "enter" on the google homepage the option "top 100 christian blogs" popped up. I was intrigued so I clicked on it. There were lists upon list of christian blogs. I happened to come across a blog entitled "Sex tips for Christian girls." Now I won't lie... I was curious. I needed no tips considering I am very intent upon not being sexual until I am married, however, I couldn't help but wonder what this was about. Was this for newly married women? Or were these tips to help girls stay virgins until they were married? I had no idea. So I decided to check it out. Well... ummm.... there was absolutely nothing "Christian" about this blog. It was basically pornography. I was shocked. I didn't read much of the blog, and I clicked out of it as soon as I could. None the less, what I read stuck with me. I couldn't get some of the words they used out of my head. I had subjected my mind to things that I didn't need to be thinking about. That is when I remembered the song that I had been singing. I didn't guard my eyes.

God wants us to believe fully in him. He wants us to trust in His will for our lives. He wants us to rely 100% on him. But satan fills our lives with lies. He tries to sneakily insert things into our minds (whether obvious or not) to keep our focus off God. Any distratction he can come up with, he will use.

I have mentioned that my faith is often weak. I need to see proof that God is working in my life. But how can God show me when I am letting things like "Sex tips for Christian girls" take up most of my thoughts. I don't know about everyone else, but when I get visuals like that in my mind, it's hard to get them out. It consumes me. Just like satan wants it to.

Proverbs 4:20-27

20 My son, pay attention to what I say; listen closely to my words. 21 Do not let them out of your sight, keep them within your heart; 22 for they are life to those who find them and health to a man's whole body. 23 ABOVE ALL ELSE, GUARD YOUR HEART, FOR IT IS THE WELLSPRING OF LIFE. 24 PUt away perversity from your mouth; keep corrupt talk far from our lips. 25 Let your eyes looks straight ahead, fix your gaze directly before you. 26 Make level paths for your feet and take only ways that are firm. 27 Do not swerve to the right or the left; keep your foot from evil.

I am a kindergarten teacher, and I often tell my kids this:

If you fill your heart with good things, good things will come out.

If you are happy on the inside, you will treat people in a way that will make them happy.

If you fill your heart with bad things, bad things will come out.

If you mad, angry and bitter on the inside, you may treat people in a way that will make them feel lmad, angry and bitter.

We can't control other people or how they treat us. However, we can control how we react to it, what we let come into our hearts, and how we manage what we see and hear.

There are different things and people in our lives that effect us in different ways. I have had relationships that have brought me down, discouraged me and made me feel bad about myself. Those relationships needed to be severed. On the other hand, there have been friendships that have made me a better person. Those friendships are God sent.

I guess today I have learned that there are things that are good for us, and things that are not so good for us, and God has given me the wisdom to discern.

Today I praise him for discernment and the ability to know when things are not good for me.

Today I am going to give up needing to be with someone every second of the day. Since my recent break up I haven't been able to be alone for a second. Today I am going to take some time to be by myself and trust God to give me the same sense of peace and solace He has given me since the very first day.